Ever thought you were forging a new friendship and then realized that is was not at all what you thought?
A few years ago I was struggling to balance a new, stressful and time-consuming job with my non-work life. I was posting about it regularly on Facebook.
Then an acquaintance took a (seemingly innocent) interest in my life. She was replying to my FB posts, offering verbal support, even asking me to have lunch with her. I was excited at the thought of exploring a new friendship, so we made plans to have lunch the next week together.
It was a beautiful spring day, so we sat outside at the restaurant. I noticed she brought a bag with her, but didn’t think anything of it. (At this point, I didn’t know what she did for a living.) We start talking about our lives. And this is where I start wondering why we’re really here.
She was asking me lots of questions about my job and lifestyle, what I really wanted in life. Then she pulls out these binders and starts telling me about how her involvement with “Company” has changed her life and has enabled her to work from home, etc.
I quickly realized that my desire for a new friend was being taken advantage of. And I wondered how I missed it.
That lunch ended awkwardly. For me at least. I went in hoping to leave with a new friend, but left with a free product and some pamphlets instead.
And then I had to tell her, again awkwardly, that I really wasn’t interested in her pitch. That I loved my job, I was just trying to figure it all out. (If she would have wanted to be my friend, she would have listened to me say those things at lunch.)
Wanna know what’s even more awkward? I still see her a few times a month. And she probably has NO idea how I felt about that lunch and our (non-existent) budding friendship.